Family Activities : 5 bad habits that will disrupt your relationship with adult children

When children leave home it is normal for the nest syndrome to emerge, but the right thing to do is to think that this is the time to take the time to do the things that we often fail to do because of commitments related to children and adolescents.

However, many parents do not stop acting as if their children were teenagers and even children. Of course, this has to do with the love, affection, and concerns that parents have about their children. This is no harm, unless it is affecting their ability to make their own decisions, take their own risks, and worse, disrupting the relationship between parents and children.

So if you parents of adults want to have a good relationship with their children, it is best to avoid these 5 harmful habits:

1. Criticizing Your Children
A criticism is never welcome. Advice, when asked for, is much more useful than it is. If something bothers parents in their children’s way of acting or in the education of grandchildren, remember that they are adults and should live their lives in any way they see fit. As long as it is not criminal, aggressive or self-destructive behavior, everyone must be free to act as he or she wishes. No matter how you want, avoid guessing. You may end up making your kids uncomfortable and questioning their choices as parents. Adult children are capable and must make their own decisions, bearing the consequences.

2. Meddling in the marriage of children
This is definitely a red flag and a limit to the actions of the parents. Do not meddle in your children’s marriage. Do not be asking all the time what is happening. If your son/daughter wants you to know how your marriage is, he or she will come and tell you. Just give advice. Unless there is abuse in any way, do not try to interfere with the way you lead your families.

3. Take everything to the personal side
If you feel offended by anything you do not like or you are not “in your way,” you can open a chasm between parents and adult children. Every parent wants to have the attention, affection, care of their children, but these children are now parents too and have to take care of their families. Do not expect them to call every day or visit every Sunday. Do not be offended by something that your daughter-in-law/son-in-law has said unintentionally. Forgive, forgive, after all, you are older, more experienced and wiser than they are now.

4. To intrude on the education of grandchildren
As much as you disagree with the behavior of the little ones, you are not responsible for their education. It is as if the family were a cake: Grandparents are the cover and the grains, but they are not the cake. we are not the parents, these are the cake, they make the decisions.

5. Move away from them
You live far away, or you’ve done some of the above, maybe all, and you end up having quarrels and misunderstandings, your grandchildren seem distant and the telephone conversations are full of gaps, so you decide to step away rather than narrow the distance. This is undoubtedly the worst of decisions. Grandparents have a lot to offer their children and grandchildren. Dr. Brann’s advice is to stay close, be it through Skype, WhatsApp or letters that kids love to receive. Try to stay more and more present.

According to experts in the subject, a bad habit is not going unless it is replaced by another. So try to act differently. Here are some guidelines that help a lot with adult children:

Recognize them as adults.
Prepare them for life and to leave the nest and move on their own legs.
Support, but do not be a full-time parent again.
Be great grandparents.

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